Bringing Home the Bacon

So Mr. T and I are wandering round the supermarket Sunday afternoon (feel free to pause in your reading to heap scorn upon my boring life) and we didn’t need very much. Specifically, we required dinner for the dogs and dinner for us. And some rice. And some chocolate. And some refills for the plug in thing that kills mosquitoes. Really, not very much at all. But we got a trolley instead of a basket anyway; reason being, we are unutterably lazy. Our trolley was uncontrollable with a wonky wheel and no cornering ability – so, just like normal then. Mr. T took control of the trolley and headed decisively to the meat section. Man buy meat! Feed canines! Good provider! And I wandered aimlessly to the vegetable section and gathered some salad stuff and some onions. We take our hunter-gatherer roles very seriously.

So really, this was all we came for. But it occurred to me that I would have to come back and shop again on, say, Wednesday or so. Why not take advantage of the free trolley-pushing labour and add some more items to the cart? Oooh! Ginger ale on special. Mmmm, red chicken curry spice paste. And so on. And then, about half-way through the supermarket, I realise all over again why it is that I go food shopping by myself. Once Mr. T is in control of the trolley, the objective is: “To Get to the Checkouts as Fast as Humanly Possible”. This doesn’t sound so bad, until you realise that his mission statement is in direct conflict with mine, which is: “To Buy Food and Bring it Home”. As an example, I’ll stop and check out the pasta section. I think … linguine. But as I turn to where the trolley should be, hand outstretched to drop in the packet of pasta … there is only empty space. Mr. T and the trolley are down at the end of the aisle, executing a dangerous turning manoeuvre around the Mother’s Day merchandise to go accelerating up the next aisle. Our joint shopping trips always end with me staggering in his wake, juggling a dozen items, because he and the trolley have been three aisles ahead of me for the entire trip. I think he’s using it as a way to keep our food bill down. Frugal AND a speed demon … is there any more alluring combination?

2 comments to Bringing Home the Bacon

  • you know, that sounds exactly like the grocery shopping trips that my hubby & i go on.
    although things are a little different nowdays with the bubby along for the trip. he holds him in the sling & goes off on his own while i push the trolley. he doesn’t admit to liking all the female “oh! what a cute baby!” attention, but i’m sure he does enjoy it. :-D

  • oh its all so familiar. except i push the trolley and then takes over if i stop for more than a few seconds. his mission is: get in and get out in less than 5 minutes. That time span applies to ALL shopping trips.. even when doing a few days shopping in one.
    if its not on the list. its not in the trolley… unless its something he wants… *sigh*

"Make a remark," said the Red Queen: "Its ridiculous to leave all conversation to the pudding!"




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