imagery

Well, it’s time to take a blogging break. Yes, I realise it looks like I already am; it’s Christmas and my city is covered in bushfire smoke. I sneezes nine times today. I counted. Anyway, I plan to do nothing involving a computer for several weeks. CAN I MAKE IT? Experts say ‘hell no’. Yet I will do my utmost to avoid the lure of the interweb. As part of this ‘no computer holiday’ I have cleared off the camera memory card for your enjoyment:

For Zoe, and the Camper meme. Long may it live! Hey, did you know shoes are really hard to take pictures of when you’re wearing them? Also, what the hell has bitten me all up my calf? Those look like fangs. Yet I feel fin– I VANT BLUUUUUUUD! GIF ME BLUUUUD! … Well. Excuse me. Can’t think what happened there.
As I was saying, these are my Christmas Campers! With cows! By the way, if you google “camper shoes cows” you will be taken straight to the world authorities on the matter; namely, Laura and myself. We’ll take questions from the floor in just a moment.

I took lots of pics of the new place. I can’t decide whether I am a midget or whether my bed is just really, really big. (Answer: both are true. Also, a tilted mirror gives a whole new perspective on your importance in the world.) And yes, that IS a birdcage filled with Christmas ornaments. What? You don’t have one? Better get on that.

“Yeah, um, that whole thing where I couldn’t stand or walk for six months? Let’s just forget it and move on. I feel pretty stupid about the whole thing. Sorry about the distress and the intensive nursing and the thousands of dollars and stuff.”

Absolutely everything you see here (bar the wall heater) was bought from eBay. I am LIVING THE DREAM, people. The dream of SPENDING MONEY whilst SITTING ON MY ARSE. What? That’s someones’s dream, I’m pretty sure.

Have a wonderful Christmas and Festivus everyone! I’ll return in January. Honest.