I know, right?

Guess what? It’s May. MAY. I don’t know where the hell this year is going. Anyway, I’ve been in New Zealand for the past three weeks, which explains my complete lack of internet-ness. The previous weeks… well, I’ve got nothing. Disappearing! It’s what we do! Anyway, now I’m back and I have some sort of hideous throat infection which has become an horrific sinus cold thing. Why am I always getting sick lately? I remember when I was never sick. Never! I took the train by god and no germs could touch me! Now, however, I have been coughing weakly and staring with great suspicion at anything which looks like food. Which is to say, anything. This has only been compounded by the smell of my kitchen, which I have not walked into for a week. You think I am joking but I am not. We came back from holiday to find the power had gone off and tripped a fuse, which meant everything had been off. Including the fridge and freezer. For a week. A WEEK. Thank god Mr T dealt with all of that because in my sickened state I couldn’t even face it. We have three fridges and two freezers and all of them were mouldy. Currently they are filled with nothing but giant mounds of baking soda and, funnily enough, ground coffee. The coffee is really doing the trick. There’s a tip for you, should you ever need to throw out $500 worth of spoiled meat. And I sincerely hope you don’t.

Little dog is back, and is… pretty big now actually. He went to his breeder’s house and played 23 hours a day with his sister and three other dogs. He’s exhausted. Also skinny, as he walks away from his bowl (an only dog, obviously) and the other four fling themselves towards the unattended food like homing missiles. Three weeks and he never learned that if he turned his back on dinner, it was NEVER THERE when he came back. The cats, on the other hand, are fat and glossy. I have no idea what they were feeding them but they are in far better condition than when we dropped them off. Sushi? Avocado oil? I should find out, they look like a shampoo ad.

4 comments to I know, right?

  • I wish I’d known about the ground coffee trick when the badcat left a bird carcass in our bedroom while we were away and it festered in 40+ degree heat for a week. Blergh. I wasn’t even in a sickened state and I made Mr Fixit clean that one up, we don’t call him Ironguts for nothing. Anyway.

    That was a lot of meat to throw out. I would also be trying scented candles, oil burners, incense and vanilla essence.

    • jac

      Thankfully insurance paid for the loss. We did offer to take photos of the spoiled meat but sadly, they didn’t want to get too up close and personal.
      Interestingly, vanilla mixed weirdly with the sort-of sweet smell of rotting meat so we gave that up pretty early in the game.

  • Oh good, you’re back!! Don’t ever leave me again. Lola and I need regular updates on the little dog.

  • Perhaps your fridges and freezers are much small than the North American average because I really need to know why you have three fridges and two freezers. It seems weird to me.

    I’m happy you’re back though – very lol-worthy post.

"Make a remark," said the Red Queen: "Its ridiculous to leave all conversation to the pudding!"




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